We went to see a friend of my wife's on Sunday and the get together was a bit alarming. My wife hadn't seen her friend for over a year due to covid restrictions I last met her about the same time when I gave the 2 of them a lift to Manchester. Her friend was chatty bubbly and full of life, had nice clothes on and wore a nice perfume. Sunday she was timid has lost weight (now skin and bones) wearing clothes that would fit her previous figure buy now baggy,and edgy in conversation. Her husband who has a decent job wasn't there but arrived about an hour into the visit having played golf! As soon as he arrived she was up to make him a drink while he changed leaving us alone. He didn't come and join us and it was noticeable that he caused an edge with his wife she appeared to be constantly listening out for him in the house. We think she is having s bad time with her husband and want to try and help her if she Is, or should we just leave it?
Leave it, let her work it out herself (but maybe suggest the 9 iron over his head as he sleeps off that drink?).
Dammed if you do and dammed if you don't, I would suggest your wife tries to speak to her privately on the phone to try to get a feeling if she is being financially and emotionally abused. She would have to do this when the husband was not around as I think the lassie might get very emotional on the phone which could get the attention of the husband if he is a highly controlling type even if he does not understand what is being said. What you describe is certainly not a healthy situation for a Filipina but if you get involved you should be prepared to potentially have to provide shelter for the lassie, if she is in a bad situation she needs to get of it before something tragic happens.
Think thats the best way to go with this, Invite them to yours, if there is something wrong they will either decline or just the wife will come, the issue you have is if bad things happen within that relationship, you and your wife will be thinking if only we had done something, ask them over then at least you have tried and your conciences can be clear.
Pre pendemic, the lady, my wife and others met on a weekly basis, husbands tended to go to parties etc. I've spoke to the guy a couple of times at parties always just small Talk! The girl group are having an outing next week to which she is invited so we will see.
