Tactics when visiting relatives in The Philippines

We're off in a couple of weeks and it will be the first time I have spent more than a couple of hours with the wife's family. Actually, it will be the first time either of us have seen them in over 4 years and we will spend a couple of days in her village where I will act as mosquito bait.

Anyway, she bought a cheap 10 pound watch to take with her. When I asked why, as she already has a perfectly good watch, she said that someone there is bound to want her watch off her so she can just give them the cheap one.

She also to tell people who ask me for cash that she is in charge of finance and to ask her.

'They won't ask me,' she says. 'They know they won't get any.'

Anyone got any other tips or advice on how not to get fleeced by extended family?

None of my extended family have ever asked me for a peso.

I guess I don't look upon them as potential beggars, but as sweet , friendly, hospitable, and generous people (who have been kind enough to provide me with a beautiful wife).

Oh, you're no fun. It's just a game.

By extended family I mean people in the village who will apparently all appear with 'dollar' signs in their eyes at the arrival of a white man, not her actual family. She says this will happen because it happened with her German brother in law.

I see her direct family as actual family, not extended family.

My advice is relax and don`t be overly defensive and Kuripot!!
It`ll probably spoil your holiday a bit.
Just have fun and pay for the BBQ buffet and beer man!
When Filipino`s visit their home town from abroad they usually are extremely generous and splash out the treats..It gives the local neighbours a break from their daily mundane existence and it usually provides a great night of cheap entertainment..
If anyone asks you for money (they probably will not) just tell them you have non as your your wife hasn't yet given you your allowance.
They will understand..lol

Anyway...Take what I say with a pinch of salt..
Just do what your wife tells you to do and you wont go far wrong!!

I'm cool with everything, Boots. It's all stuff my wife was saying, and I thought it was rather amusing so I put it on here . It wasn't supposed to come across as a serious concern, but obviously did.

We're only in the village for one day (2 nights) anyway.

It's true about the generosity. She bought a massive suitcase recently, which is getting filled with stuff. The stuff, plus the suitcase itself, will not be coming back.

None of my extended family have tried it on. Only the minibus driver who was someone they knew rather than a relative. I actually found most to be generous in their own way.

Last time my wife travelled to the Philippines, in April, she filled one entire suitcase with goodies maxing out on her luggage allowance alone.

Your family, or rather your wife's relatives, should protect you both from needy acquaintances and strangers who discover there's a rich Kano staying. I'd be more concerned about the airborne rather than the human "vampires". The SAS apparently uses a body lotion containing Citronella (and one or two other mildly beneficial plant-based extracts) sold under the Dove label which, they say, is both cheaper and more effective than dedicated anti-mosquito products. Stock up at Boots!

Mosquitoes and marauding neighbours may be the least of your problems, however whereas time, or lack thereof, may well be to the fore. Your wife hasn't been to her place for four years, there's a lot of catching-up with old friends and family members, some of whom will make special journeys to come to see her. And spend time with her. At first this can be fun but after a couple of days - and you've still not had (long) conversations with everyone, it can get a tad tiring especially as these conversations will not be in English. So be warned! Take a good thick novel and stuff your phone with music - and don't forget to take a rechargeable battery-pack or two. This is your wife's time, let her enjoy!

Kick-back, relax and if you get the chance, sample the Don Papa.

Ha ha. Funny thing is, she doesn't want that, which is why we are only there for one day. We are taking her mum and dad and some nieces to Boracay to avoid such happenings, and she hasn't even told them when we are coming back and going to the village so that nobody will know until we get there.

Otherwise, she says, the whole village will be there waiting when we turn up. But this way, by the time everyone realises it,, it's time to leave again.

She just wants to see her close family and doesn't care about anyone else.

I think it depends on the family. I've spent some time with my wife's family and paid for food, beer and so forth. We have also been asked for money. Best thing is to let her handle it, and don't be tempted to show off, look rich, or be overly generous. If you buy food at a restaurant, for example, make sure you keep control of the guest list, or you may wind up feeding 30 people. You may also want to ensure that you don't have lots of valuables with you in your luggage, such as expensive smart phones and so on. My wife was very careful that we kept an eye on our belongings. It's not been unknown for cousins and other such people in the house to make off with small unguarded items.

Every trip... after my jet-lag has subsided, I take a crowd of our relatives to the local beach, where we rent a big beach cottage and a karaoke. There follows an enjoyable day of picnicking, singing, swimming, and playing on the beach.

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For her family - If you're wife isn't already doing it - take plenty of UK sweeties - small bars of chocolate and crap like that.

For yourself - take your smart phone and power bank and make sure it's loaded so you can browse the net get the news and sit on the Brit Filipino forum.

Yeah that's the Filipino thing to do

I've seen your posts on this before and thought that your situation is similar to ours.

I'm under strict instructions to tell anyone asking for anything that she is in charge of money.

We have a spare suitcase in th bathroom ready to be filled. Even the suitcase isn't coming back!

I agree with your wife. The official statment is that 'i've remitted all my salary to my wife and she does the budgeting so i dont have any money of my own (or im still waiting for my allowance).'

Overall, it depends on the situation - if your wife has been 'extra generous' with extended family, then you will have difficulty changing that part now but if you have been consistently saying 'no' then a no this time would just be a normal thing.

Of course, pasalubong or gifts to close or special family or friends are a welcome surprise.

my wife has booked a flight for the back end of october--going with her sister and 23rd cousin 45 times removed--both settled here in the UK. staying for 3 weeks. now starting to shop for instant coffee, toblerones, tinned spam all to be crammed into her suitcases. 40 kg travel allowance i understand.. hope she has a great time. i will miss her.

I love going back to cavite to see family as have a gud laugh and just buy crates of red horse (big mistake as knocks me silly lol) and food,then show myself up as stay up all night doing karaoke lol.

40 kg baggage allowance?! I think you ought to check that before she packs too much! I don't know of any airline whose Economy Class allowance is so generous.

46 kg. Qatar airways.

Erm, sorry, no! See here, the allowance is 30 kg unless she's travelling Business Class where it's 40 kg.