Wanting to know more about filippinos

Hello I've just joined this website because I would like to know more about filippinos ,their character snd culture.
I'm gay and really wanting a filippino partner,with a view to marriage.There seem to be plenty of filippinos back home who want to meet british men,but I'm finding it hard to find them here in the UK-there don't seem to be any websites focused on that.
I've met one filippino guy but I'm concerned that cultural differences are causing misunderstandings and a real barrier.For example,apparently kissing in public made him very uncomfortable and thought it "uneducated" to do this.I'm not sure I understand what he meant.Also I would normally read body language in a certain way,but do filippinos have the same body language?-for example, we have had two dates and in thr second one he barely looked at me in the gay bar we went to,but still let me kiss him passionately.And he's very quiet.Is it normal for younger filippinos to be quiet or reserved?
-I woukd normally read lack of eye contact as lack of interest in me,but is this also the case with filippinos?
Some of my friends are concerned that he's actually straight and only wants to marry a guy so.he can get a working visa.He says he's bi.
A cultural minefield for me-talk about blurred messages!

Your friends are probably right.

Listen to your friends they are closer to the situation than we are! The fact you are concerned speaks volumes

I don't know if this helps...

There's nothing "wrong" with being gay here - quite a few of the neighbours or their children obviously are and they are accepted by all - even younger children are not afraid to be "gay" so it's a bit different to the UK.

Public kissing is not common - teens maybe - anything more (I'm thinking of the a holes you get doing it on the Ryanair flights etc) definitely frowned upon.

Filipino's doing what they have to do to get what they want is very common - Obvious example: young girls sleeping with the grandad's that come here on holiday etc. and smiling and partying through it for the cash or longer term support that it leads to.

The best thing to do is plan ahead - take a long holiday here and see for yourself.

Warning: big aids problem here and big drug problems too - especially in gay community.

As stated your friends would see the situation far better we can here on a forum. There are definitely cultural differences but if the relationship does endure you may come to understand them better.

When I embarked on a relationship with someone from the Philippines I spent hours and hours reading articles on the web to try to understand some of those cultural nuances.

I’m sure that public displays of affection can be uncomfortable for the shy types. There is a spanish term called delicadesa that is also inevitably integral to filipino culture.

If he were to marry you he doesn’t need a working visa.

I have yet to meet a gay person who is shy. Most of my gay friends doesnt care what others think including PDA - i would also partially attribute this to maturity as most of them are over 30s. It not the case when we were in our teens and early 20s- majority are confused and shy.

But i would also ask - has he actually confessed to being gay? If he is closet one then that partially explains the situation. maybe he hasnt fully accepted his sexuality whether bi, gay or straight?

Might help if you even bothered to learn how to spell FILIPINO, never mind worrying about 'cultural' differences... which are VAST.

I'm assuming it's a troll post anyway.

You are obviously the troll on here.If you can't say anything constructive,don't bother posting.I am.asking an honest question and the word is easy to get wrong so just go away and troll somebody else sad person.

He told me is bi and is a top.But was very coy about kissing and didn't like talking about sex.

Are cultural differences really that vast? I can't say I've ever really noticed many in my relationship.

Yes well the cultural differences seem to be causing lots of misunderstandings. On the other hand,he seems to be behaving in a way that I find suspicious and that seem to transcend cultural barriers.Like,he won't have sex until we're married. Doesn't like "too much" kissing.Didn't look at me in the pub but let me kiss him.

Sounds as though he has a greater sense of propriety and that has nothing to do with him being a Filipino.

You just seem to be looking at him and his personality and then making it a judgement on "Filipinos".

To be honest, I kind of agree with him on the kissing in public anyway. Why do you feel the need to do that if you know he isn't comfortable with it? A lot of people don't want to go around kissing their partners publicly. Seems a bit uneccesary really.

took me a long while to persuade my wife to hold hands when out and about--she tended to walk a few paces behind me. and this was in the UK !

perhaps she was ashamed to be seen with me.

No I'm not "judging filippinos"-cultures are different,not better or worse,just different.All relative,no value judgement.
Well I like kissing in comfortable safe environments like gay bars because I'm a warm,affectionate person.I'm not emotionally cold like some English peoplease, I like to show affection thats not wrong it's just human. ..and since every other partner I've had does that,I find it unusual.Just confusing for me.

Big Mac
Obviously not ashamed since she married you lol!!!
Maybe my tactile,affectionate nature simply doesn't fit into either British or Filipino culture!

All partners are different.

For me personally, the need to kiss in public faded rather after I grew out of my teens. Nothing to do with emotional coldness. If anything, it's rather base behaviour, which is why most of us probably resort back to it when we've had a few drinks!

I think you just need to look at how your partner feels about things too. That's how relationships work.

I can just imagine my wife's reaction if we went to a pub and I suddenly decided I wanted a snog in full view of everyone! The word "tampo" comes to mind

to be brutally honest--i dont like the sound if this. who is calling the shots here? have you explained to your future partner the huge costs you will incur as sponsor if it goes that far ? and--even more importantly----he will have to stick with you for the next 5 years after the wedding ?---or hes on the next plane back. gone are the days of asian brides buggering off before the ink is even dry.

What a wind up and guess who fell for it!! lol.