How to survive in an argument........

All of us argue, but is their a cultural difference to the way Filipinas argue to the way that British men react?

Perhaps we could discuss types of arguments.........

Know thyself first.

Simple statement, hard to do.

Bye

Never argue with an idiot, they will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

on misuse thats very subjective unless its my funds lol

Unlike most couples we never argued over cash, lucky like that

Can we have a choon? It's a belter.



Delete if out of place, please.

I need your attention, put away the gadgets, listen to me - or I’ll get mad and I’ll even hit you - don’t argue just remain silent and I’ll calm down or

I want a divorce if you won’t give me one I’ll make your life hell.....

Or

You argue with her and she doesn’t talk for four days.......

Or

I’m leaving and later she comes home.........

Now which kind of woman is she? Do all women have problems..........

A problem is - we can't afford to pay the rent. We can't eat. I've got my todger caught in the exhaust again.

A test is something a woman (sweeping statement alert) does for adrenal stimulation, to prove that you care, to find your boundaries, and in some cases, good ole power and control.

All women test, to some extent. Some more than others, and some have 'reasons' to. The actual reasoning is important and differs from an excuse.

But beyond that there is downright abuse.

Perhaps any attempt at understanding should concentrate more on who he is and who she is - and the third entity, the actual relationship between them - rather than the species itself.

I apologise if this is no good at all to you, I'm just throwing this out there, if this is more than hypothetical musings and you want to chat you can always PM me.

my wife and I used to argue all the time and it was always about algerbra, she's now my X

To Oss,

If we're talking roulette then there is always one rule - house wins, inevitably. Mathematics will always win out over time. Roulette can be great for a quick 20 if you know when to walk away, but even over time it's usually 47.7% for, so there's that maths again.

I think that, being honest, if I look back at my scores of failed relationships, some utter horror shows, most issues were obvious at the start. I chose to ignore them, and of course I was pretty blind to my own issues, which were substantial.

Case in point: a girl who I dated very quickly told me she was the ice queen, and she was this and that, and I laughed it off, we had a connection and an attraction and thought we'd be ok and the you-know-what was great with this pretty one. Well. We moved in together, and I allowed her to trample over me. Who's fault? Mine, of course, not excusing behaviour, but she told me what she was and I failed to set any boundaries. Nature will take its course but nature really isn't about great relationships, nature is about procreation and that will override any sense unless the person knows himself first.

Nobody can really change anybody, and even people who go to assorted therapies are often heavily resistant to change.

It took me a long time to learn, and I learned the hard way, as I'm far more stupid than I realise. I just call them red flags. But there's no point looking for them long after the relationship has started. Then you're into disaster management territory, and trying to make the best of a bad lot, which sounds like where you are, and you have my utter sympathy with that.

Your making sense

What turned you on in the beginning........ the shape, the sex ?

Conventionally, Ice Queens are physically attractive women with off-putting personalities and repulsive attitudes. They are very narcissistic and have little regard for another's interests and feelings; they show little or no empathy

The connection. But that does not in itself make for a good relationship.

Whoa be cautious about labels!

You end up looking at the label and not the person.

Models are useful but only as starting points.

It has been suggested that men go this way in understanding wimmin:

The women you're looking at
The whole female species
The whole species
Yourself

And its argued to go the other way. How can you deal with anyone else genuinely if you don't know Who You Are?

Y

= BODMAS

Friend of mine has 2 children living with their mum in pinas, he is separated from her and lives here in West London, the mother of his kids told him she had cancer, he sent cash, lots of cash, all those treatments add up, after a year and a half he found out she was healthy as can be, she had invented the cancer to get cash so she could have a great time with her new boyfriend
Friend of mine was in the PI when his girlfriend gave birth, gave the mother-in-law the cash to pay the hospital bill, the MIL went missing for several days and turned up shamefaced having found a mahjong game and tried to double the amount of cash she was meant to be paying at the hospital. She lost the lot.

i hate arguments.

my first wife was very good at it--and if she didnt win--she would brood on it for days. the outcome was usually a violent physical outburst with me on the receiving end. 13 years of hell.

i rarely argued with my second wife--she usually gave in and forgot about it. we were married 23 years. mostly happy times. well--for me anyway.

wife 3 --i came to realise was bi-polar. she would switch in an instant from being sweetness itself to a complex nutcase. a walter mitty character, believing her own invented fantasies. i came home from work one day to find a note in the kitchen--she was gone. i divorced her after 2 years separation; we were married 5 years.
she lives nearby--with her married son.
she leaves me well alone.

my 4th wife is filipina.
need i say more ?