I really need an outlet for my troubled mind right now, and some words of encouragement...! As regulars on this forum will know, my fiancee's settlement visa was approved this weekend just gone. We were both beside ourselves with happiness, and we had many video and voice conversations over the weekend to discuss her travelling to the UK. Before the decision, and return of her passport, she had tickets to fly back to Bohol on Monday, to see her parents for a few days (and to drop off some of her belongings which she didn't want to bring to the UK). I had paid for return flight tickets for her and her sister to go together. Sunday afternoon (late evening for her), she was with her sister in a hotel in Manila. She voice-called me a few times. We were both still excited and shared loving conversations. Monday morning at 03:50 (UK time), she dropped me a single FB message, to say they're at the airport (NAIA). Since then, I've heard nothing. Zilch. No message to say she'd landed, or that she got to her parents. My Facebook messenger messages to her reach Facebook's servers, but are not received by her, and not read. She's offline on Skype. We have a shared gmail account - but activity shows no login from the Philippines since Oct 8th. I tried to FB message the sister she lives with (not the one she's travelling with), but the message icon is greyed-out. FB help suggests that either I've blocked her, she deleted her account, or she's blocked me. The last time I messaged her was in April, when my fiancee had chicken pox, and I was trying to get an update on how she was. So I don't really know when she apparently blocked me (or why!?). I don't know what to do. When she had chicken pox, she was offline for about 17 hours, and it killed me. This time around it's now over 24 hours, and it's just not normal - especially considering the important point in our relationship. I know a day doesn't sound like a lot, but when we're both awake, we're messaging very regular; like hourly (even while I'm at work). To not receive a single 'good morning' or 'good night' from her is unheard of. In the 11 months I've known her, this has never happened. I checked her flight to Bohol, and it landed fine, so shouldn't be any problems there. I've been to her parents house a few times before, and had a signal out there. And when she stayed there in January she managed a few FB video calls to me. So, despite it being out in the sticks somewhat, I think she'd have a signal. I Googled for any current storms or issues which could cut her off, but nothing really showing up for me. Also, both her brothers live at the family house, who will have internet access of some description, so she could surely use theirs to get a quick messages to me. A couple of trips back, I gave her a piece of paper which detailed my home address, work and home email address, my work and home phone numbers, my Skype account and Facebook account. So she can contact me multiple ways. She keeps this safe in her purse at all times. I can't get my head around it. I am/was convinced she loves me. She's now got the visa, so all she has to do is get on a plane next month, for a new life with someone who loves her and will work to give her the world. I'd rather be dead, than find out that she's just decided she doesn't want any of this and has cut me off P.S. Sorry for the long post.
perhaps she lost her phone and all contacts and cant remember her login patience and quiet confidence may be needed untill theres something clear to go on
I think the issue is infrastructure possibly if this article is anything to go by http://www.pna.gov.ph/articles/1050312
It's been 27 hours now since I heard from her. I wish she knew how concerned I was. A 30 minute ride will get her into Tag City, where she could surely get a message to me! It's not like she's got anything else to do out there
Your going to have to hang on in there! Not a lot else you can do,she might be having a " hen night" I am sure it will work out.
After all we've been through, said and done together, I wished she would just tell me if that's the case. At least i'd know. She's literally sat at her sister's house for 10 months without work, waiting for my visits and the visa. And now she has it - she quits? I just can't accept it.
38 hours without contact now. I just tried to send a FB Messenger message to the sister she travelled with, and that message looks to stick in the same state as those I send to my fiancee. Received by Facebook servers, but not received by the recipient. I'm hoping this means that they are both out of range or without batter power for some reason (though I really don't think her sister is a big Facebook user - maybe only uses it if she uses someone else's tablet or computer etc).
I am friends with two of her brothers on FB, but they're active maybe once a year on there. I have the sister she lives with on FB, but she's apparently blocked me. And the sister she travelled with is also a FB friend, but she seems to have been offline around the same time as my fiancee. For instance, I have dropped her a quick FB message, asking what's going on, and it tells me she was last active a day ago. I have my fiancee's phone number, but that's a sore subject. Calling from the UK usually ends up going through some VOIP system, which ends up with the "caller's" number on her phone appearing to be in the Philippines or Singapore etc. Last time I tried to call her, she flipped out because she thought I had other women in these countries and was calling from there! So I'd rather avoid that for now...!
I believe it's understandable if you call her after 48hrs. You're not even sure if she arrived safely. So that's good excuse to call her. Try to call tomorrow afternoon if you receive nothing from her. It will be more than 48hrs already.
2 years ago, I went on a long weekend break to Stockholm. Upon the recommendation of a friend, I took a boat trip to a small island which was supposed to picturesque, authentic etc. Was actually quite boring. Anyway, whilst waiting for the boat back to Stockholm, I was just ambling along the coast. Reliving parts of my youth investigating rock pools. And then my feet started slipping. I could not prevent gravity. In slow motion, I plunged backwards into the sea. It was freezing. I dragged myself back up the slippery rocks, only to slip back into the sea. Finally, I made it back to dry land utterly bedraggled. Nobody (to the best of my knowledge) saw me fall into the sea. People did see me after I saved myself and must have thought I was bonkers. I quickly went to the lavatory to use the hand dryers on sodden clothes. I missed the boat and ended up waiting a further 2 hours on that bloody island in my wet clothes. I looked at my LG mobile phone and the screen flickered. Turned it off and hoped for the best. Back in my hotel in Stockholm, I tried drying out my clothes again and see if I could get any life out of the LG. Wala. It was borked. I was rather angry with myself but felt I could manage 3 days without a mobile. When I got back home, Miss R was livid. She was convinced I had been seeing another person. When I demonstrated the poorly LG, only then did she begin to believe me. I never expected that a 3 day "online" absence would cause so much drama. I'm sure there will be an innocent explanation for your situation. If anything were to go pear shaped, I'd expect it to be closer to December when the day of reckoning is getting closer to a reality.
Thank you for the story @PorkAdobo . It does stress two points. 1) How sh*t can just happen. 2) How much we worry about our loved ones when they suddenly break usual communication habits. Good news is, she got in touch late last night. She just said she had "no network", and had to pay 15 peso for load. But it appeared to take her two days to realize this, as I got a stream of messages spanning the time she's been offline! Phew!
