At the end of the day one of three things has happened in this situation. 1. The guy has lied and is a blagger and deserves everything he gets. 2. The guy is telling the truth but can't/won't produce the paperwork. 3. The guy has chanced his arm told a few half truths and dug himself a hole and he can't find away out of he might be divorced but has said something else which will bring the rest of the story crashing down and doesn't want to hurt anyone Jury's out on this one though
I agree in particular point 3 of your post, probably dug himself a hole realised his half home truths are about to come back and bite him on the bum, knows he has a decision to make,often changes in behaviour are good pointers I. E. Always on a forum telling the world and his mother what's going on in their lives then nothing at all, to busy to talk due to work pressures etc. Your friend has a decision to make, trust someone who has not been truthful or straight now and may so be in the future, or ditch him. Good Luck
I'm separated and going through a divorce. I cannot imagine why I would hide those facts unless I was lying.
i think a far more serious issue with any budding UK / Filipina relationship---isnt if the UK guy is divorced or not---its whether the pinay lady is still married ! most UK guys--myself included--had no idea of the sh*t storm of problems--and expense ---that would be heading their way.
This is quite a difficult question to answer. The best way to do this is ask point blank "Are you divorced? Where are your papers to prove it?". The best thing I can think of rather than making your own investigations which will require countless of suspicions/theories and spend hours and hours.
Your friend can actually pay a detective agency a small amount (i think it was 50$) to get basic information on the guy. If she wants to double check the information. All she need is to provide his full name and date of birth (knowing his mum and dad's name helps). The report includes school attended, civil status (marriages or divorces), work history etc all of which is a matter of public record. But if you dont trust someone, then its not a good foundation to any relationship. When i first started 'seeing/talking' to my husband, all my friends were very cautious of him for me since he is in his early 40s and never been married (he might be married or gay or a murderer). For them it was 'suspicious' enough. But he has introduced me to his friends and siblings and with little push, they told me he hasnt just found anyone special. Hence the importance of meeting him in UK.
I think Jenny has had more than enough advice now to advise her friend. She seems a pretty switched-on kind of person and from the outset I think she knows in herself what has to be done......... Good luck Jenny's friend in seeing this through to conclusion.
@tipipay I think she's already done that and all she got was excuses and telling her that he will show it to her soon and he will sort everything out. Anyway, thanks for the advice.
@Maley that would be hard for her because she's not in the UK and it's hard to follow up things if she's all the way here. But glad to know that you found the one and he was honest about his status. ☺️
@Maharg because if he's not lying, he could've shown his papers already right? But I guess until now, no papers yet.
@Distance waterways what made you say number 2? I kind of agree with the third one too but still it's hard to tell because we are not in the situation.
I meant to suggest if she wanted to know some things such as public records like marriages and divorces it can be done and the detective stuff can be employed online (i know of a friend who did it at the very start. She later on admitted it to her now husband but you can never be careful- the guy might be a human trafficker etc.)
Yeah but I never showed my partner any papers and she was never interested in seeing any because there was no reason to think otherwise. Why does this person need to see divorce papers? Are there reasons for not believing he is divorced? Has she asked him and then he has refused? It just seems a strange situation to me.
I ment that he might be telling the truth but for some reason he doesn't have the paperwork or doesn't want to show it
I think if he doesn't have anything to hide then he will just show it right? And yeah she asked him already and i think the guy just said he will show it to her but until now no papers.
